Thursday, April 28, 2005

The Birds are Chirping

Spring is in full bloom and we are oh so happy. The days are lasting longer and the air grows warm. The trees are blossoming and the flowers are peeking out. Even the animals are happy. Dogs are frolicking, squirrels are scurrying, and the birds are singing. That includes the biggest bird of them all: Curt Schilling, or as I've started to call him, 'Chirpy'. He can't go more than a week without sounding off about something. He's starting to sound like a really, really annoying chick (see: Kathie Lee Gifford). You know, I used to dig him. That was when he would hit the Sons of Sam Horn message board, call in to the radio stations to simply chew the fat, and do video game reviews that ended with the word 'Woot!'. But, those days are over. Nowadays all we hear is preaching and whining and bitching and moaning. Why doesn't he just shut up? Well, I'm thinking that there's several possible reasons for the increased level of chatter from Chirpy McChirp-Chirp:

1. His wife and kids ignore him at home.

2. He's trying to draw attention away from the fact that he doesn't recover as quickly from injuries now that he stopped doing 'roids.

3. He's realized that he his chatter-quota has to increase exponentially in order to maintain relevance and stay ahead of the curve.

4. He is over-compensating for the loss of the other squawker, Pedro.

5. He knows he won't make it to the Hall on stats alone.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Know your role, shut your hole. And by the way, words have a heck of a lot more impact when you're pitching some lights-out baseball instead of tossing beachballs to the hitters and/or hanging out on the DL with Mr. Donut.

8 Comments:

Blogger silverfox said...

GO TWINS!!!!

7:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Big Tony said the REAL BIRDS that are chirping are the BIRDS OF BALTIMORE be careful Rivals be very, very, careful.

1:28 PM  
Blogger The Rivals said...

Big Tony,

You got that right. I'm quaking in my pants, and I'm sure Red is doing the same thing. Just need for Ponson to eat a couple more donuts and he'll be on the DL with Wells and Wright. It'll even things up a bit...

Thanks for checking in!

-Blue

9:11 AM  
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