Monday, February 07, 2005

No Radio For Me

Arrgh. Looks like my days of listening to the Yankees on the radio have gone the way of the Dodo. Why, you ask? Two people: John Sterling and Suzyn Waldman. Can you think of a more grating duo in the radio booth? I'd rather grind my teeth against a curb than listen to those two run their mouths. The stuff they say is usually totally banal or totally wrong, there's absolutely no insight into the game and it's strategy, and they aren't swift enough to come up with meaningful statistics of the Yankees or their opponents.

Suzyn Waldman sometimes talks like she has marbles in her mouth, stumbles over facts left and right, and can't seem to come up with an anecdote that is meaningful or germane to the action on the field. Her interviews are totally boring and never hard hitting. It's like she's afraid to offend the Yankee brass and players. Maybe that's why Steinbrenner likes her. Who knows. All I know is that I can't stand the woman.

And that brings us to John Sterling. Sterling cracks me up. He just can't wait to give his little signature call. He's like a little chihuahua who gets all excited and wets himself. At least once a game you hear him say: "Swung on and there it goes! That ball is high! It is far! It is............. caught by the right fielder in front of the warning track." I mean, c'mon! He's like a real-life version of Joe Buck's Slam-a-lama-ding-dong commercial, but for balls hit inside the freakin' stadium. So, John - Please... pretty Please... with sugar on top... if you're not sure it's a home run, don't give a home run call. It doesn't do anyone any good for you to get your panties in a bunch over a near miss.

So that's that. It's only TV for me this year. Now I'm gonna have to start getting to work at 7AM so I can rush home to watch the games with Kay, Kaat, Murcer, and Singleton. I guess the only good thing about this setup is that Evan still gets to hear "The Yankees win! The-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh Yankees WIN!". It's his absolute favorite thing in the whole wide world.

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